HaIz...im sick n tired of my life...criously...i hate to put up a front of my frens...im sick n tired of trying to b happi which IM NT!!...im nt happy wif my life...nvr evr in d 1st plc..its jus tt i try to be...it hurts....it realli does...sobx sobx...=( Do i realli haf frens..??..frens tt i cn trust whole heartedly??...frens tt i luv?? frens tt will awaes by my side if prob arises??.... or frens tt backstabbed me frm behind??... or frens tt run awae wen i gt probs??...or frens tt jus leave u to rot by urself..??... to all my frens out dere...i hope tt me trusting u is d best thing i've ever done in my life...i hope so...pls make it true...i dun wan to regret it ltr....i hope i cn trust u n u trust me...i really wld want tt...haiz...is tt too much 2 ask..??..(i realli wonder abt my sec frens...cn i actualli trust dem..??..) i hope so..i realli hope so....pls dun make me lose faith in u guys.....pls....
Anywae...i like dis gurl in my skool...but im nt sure wht she likes me or nt....or does she just treat me as a fren oni....??...HmM...i dunNo...i tot of askin her to go to d prom wif me....but half of me wld want to ask her...but half of me is holding me back....am i scared tt she'll reject me..??.. or am i jus shy...??...shld i ask her..??...im afraid tt it will affect my frenship wif her if i were to ask her...evrything will b ruined...i dun wan tt 2 happen...i wan evrythin 2 b as per normal if aft i ask her abt it....HaIz....Wish me luck guys....i try to summon my courage to ask her...hopefully evrythin goes smoothly 4 me....
Haiz...2dae gt back my hist test back sia...i passed ar...yeah...dots...dots...my marks so lousy lor..i gt 64/100....omg...nt even a2 lor...haiz...n sumore highest in d class u noe...isnt tt lousy..??...i badly wanted to score a1 or a2 for it...but its jus over...my class is d 2nd class amg 2 classes....5a2 is d 1st class....apparently...mostly all d top student is in it....omg...hw to compete wif dem sia...bt mayb we cn...i awaes tell myself tt i cn do it...!! i noe i cn do it!! n i did...midyr i did win sum of d top student...i gt 19 4 d whole sec 5 u noe...is tt great..??.. but to me its nt great..in fact im lousy...im hopeless...i cnt even pass my maths n sci....haiz....y am i so stupid..??
cn i go back to d past..??..i criously want too...i want to do d tings tt i nvr did in d past...4 eg.. askin F to b my gf...if nt we'll still b 2gther till eternity...I LUV HER SO MUCH!! study 4 my PSLE....if nt i go to Xpress stream...but nw evrythin is TOO late aldy....haiz...I realli regretted nt doin all those things.....wd to do..???... strive forward..?? like duh uh!! okok...i wanna ciao liao...ZhAnEy peace outz!!