Monday, February 26, 2007
Oh goSh..i miss dem so much!! dis is our last prom pic 2gther b4 we all went home...i relli wanna relived tt nite..it ws jus simply da bomb!!! D dancing n eating together....it ws jus simply awesome..i relli hope tt nite wld nvr end but its too much to ask though...oh well..
anywae i was told by my tcher tt i cnt combined my o lvl certs if i were to retake it...F**K laR!! Hate it so much!!! aft been thinkin d past few daes..i tot i knew wd im gg do...but nw..im jus at my wits now...i RELLI..n i RELLI mean it tt i RELLI dunno wd to do now!!! HaIx....HaIx....i wanted to tok to my bro...but he ws bz playin his game...oh well..nvrmind...let him play lo...its nt impt anywae.......i hope i cn jus think it thru by myself...its aftall my life....oh well....but im at a loss now....argg....
Shld i retake my whole entire 5 subjs again..?? d tot of gg thru anotha 1 yr of immense torture again is jus giving me cold feet...im afraid...im afraid tt if i were to retake...will i still b able to achieve d results again..or betta??.. i've completely forgotten everything!!! n i relli mean it EVERYTHING!!! Im SuCh A FaIlUrE!!
I ReLli FeEl ThAt Im a FaIlUrE... Im BoRn To FaIl... Im BoRn To B NoBoDy... I'Ve FaIlEd In AlL CaTeGoRiEs...Y GoD JuS CnT LeT mE HaV My WaE FoR OnCe?? HaIx...
I ReLli HoPe I Cn Go ThRu DiS ObStAcLe...
Wednesday, February 21, 2007
hey yall...
i did sum campin at west coast..haha...well its been a long time since i camp...ok lar...it ws nt bad...i didnt slpt at all...omg..it ws so awful...me nt slping 4 d whole nite is jus terrible...i gt big eyebags nw...oh no..i look horrible..hahaha...relli needed slp...12 hrs still nt enuf...i nid 2 daes of slp man...hahaha....well...d camping ws ok lar..nt bad...its quite boring i mus sae....nthy to do....BORING!! BORING!! BORING!! its d time 4 me to b emo..haha..alone in d nite...jus music to my ears n my thots...tokin to myself...saying hw stupid i am..to actualli fail my o lvl...arggg...im relli angry at myself...relli disappointed...im hopeless...
my frens sae...a fall is jus a step to success...n i do noe tt...but my fall is simply too much..i broke a leg...n it nids time to heal...a vry long time..i noe i noe...i musnt take too long..i dun haf much time....i relli luv my frens...dey blive in me so much...thnxs guys!! i musnt disappoint d ppl arnd me...especially my family...n definitely myself....yesh!!!
MY DIS YR RESOLUTION.....
I WILL STUDY HARD N MAKE MYSELF PROUD N MY FAMILY N FRENS!!! I WILL!! I PROMISE YALL...!!!
Saturday, February 17, 2007
hey yall...
yest ws quite fun i guess...in d morn we i mean me der n fiz sent cher to d airport...she's gg to taiwan...cool...haha...gg miss her 4 1 wk....anywae aft tt we went to eat mac...well...4 d 1st time ever i cnt finish my food...criously...i dunno y..jus no appetite....mayb my failure still is bothering me..oh well...so we were bored n decided to watch movie...coz we wldnt wan to go home straight...n bsides der mitin jas...n me n fiz gg to werk ltr at 6...so we watched epic movie...n oh boy...ws it funni..it ws hilarious..i jus cnt stop laughing..haha..but it was kinda lame as well...haha...im so gg buy d cd...
aft tt we went walkin n more walking arnd bugis...to pass time i guess...n of course we were bored....haha..n d more we walk d more tired we were...n d more lazy i bcome to go to werk..haha...well basically d dae ws fun in d beginging..but in d end we didnt haf enuf time to actualli haf more fun...haix......
Friday, February 16, 2007
U NOE WD U GUYS??
i noe im so keen in retakin my o..but d thing is...do i have what it takes to do it all over again..??...i've relli fallen to the ground wen i received my resutls... n d thot of retakin it seems pointless...it seem unrealistic...coz im nt sure wht im up for it...i noe it aint gg b ez...but cn i still withstand the immense torture again n strive forward??
sumtimes i relli tot of giving up...bye bye being a doctor...but shld i jus giv that up aft jus 1 failure?? my frens been encouraging me to move forward..4gt abt my past failures...n jus move forward...but its hard...its relli relli hard...im nt sure wht im ready 4 it...
IM STRESSED!! IM CONFUSED!!
WD SHLD I DO??Labels: STRESSED
Tuesday, February 13, 2007
haix...its been 3 daes since i received my o results..but still im nt sure wd shld i do....shld i retake o n jus concentrate on it...or retake o n jus go in any course in poly n retake o at d same time...or go ite n retake o oso....haix...im at a loss...im stress!! oh wd shall i do...??
anywae yest went out wif dan,jan,faz,mar...haha..it ws fun..we went to tp 4 enquiries...n oh my god were d lecturers so rude n jus nt interested like tt...oh well..den went to ite simei coz i mayb considering to go dere oso...im quite clear wd d course in ite is abt nw....but still i cnt make up my mind..my frens kip pestering me sayin tt dun go ite dun go ite no matter wd...haix...i jus dunno...
anyhow aft tt we had to walk to simei mrt unda d blazing scorchin hot sun...omg..ws it hot!! i cld hav gt heatstroke....haha...lol..but criously its so damn hot lar...aiyoh...den aft tt duno whr to go liao...den go tamp ph to pei faz take her typhoid form...along d wae...daniel scare d hell out of jan..haha...he scream like gurl...n oh boy ws i impressed..he cld hit tt same high note evrytime...hahaha...it ws funni...if u were dere..u wld laugh ur head off too..it ws fun...n oh ya i 4gt to tell u guys..jan cut his hair aft bring forced by us to cut his hair...coz it looks horrible wen he straightened it...n his hair is like so spoilt aldy lo...so we forced him to cut his hair...n he did...in d end he liked his new hair..haha...u shld tank us jan...shld treat all of us...nw u look great..haha... den we took neoprints....haha..it turned out okok ar...but all of us like so shack...so d pics didnt turn out d wae we expect it to be...hahaha..nonethelss it ws awesome...
haix...even though it ws a great day...im still ws worried abt wd i shld do...my mind is in a whirl rite nw...jus dunno wd to do....my fren sae its up to me...my choice...my future is in my hands...i guess he's rite....i shld reli think wd i shld do..hmm..i haf to make up my mind by 2moro coz nid to submit it...haix...hmm..hopefully i make d right choice ppl...pray hard 4 me....
IM SO STRESSED UP!! I JUS FEEL THAT IM A FAILURE!!
HAIX....
Sunday, February 11, 2007
haix...2daes ago i jus received my o lvl results..whc i waited for so damn long to gt it...but it ws a disappointment....I FAILED MY MATHS N SCIENCE!!! i jus dunno wd to do nw..im at a loss rite nw...ppl told me its nt d end but its relli damn hard to pick myself up n move on 4ward wif my head up high...dey jus dun gt it...i failed my maths n science...whr cn i go..?..my future is jus ruined..i jus duno wd to do....
d dae i gt my results ws d dae i actualli cried my heart out...i cried in d skool hall...it ws pretty embarrasing...but i cldnt care less anywae...sum of my frens tried to console me...being dere 4 me..saying tt its nt d end n stuffs...i wld relli wanna tank dem so much!! i relli appreciate it...i relli needed sum 1 2 b dere 4 me coz i noe i'll nvr do well in my o...too many probs n i jus cldnt concentrate on my o lvl properly...its amazing tt i cld actualli gt B3 for my combined humans n poa....its relli a miracle i mus sae...
dere are oso ppl who nvr did well..i relli pity dem...i hope all of dem r ok...ill b dere 4 dem if dey nid me... :) ...
its been 2 daes tt i tried consoling myself tt its nt d end...try have faith in myself..i noe i cn do it...d oni mindset i have now is mostly negative...i jus cant go on like dis..at dis rate i cld jus collapsed anytime w/o knowing it myself....i've been telling myself tt its nt d end...mayb dis is wd god have in store 4 me...a very hard obstacle blocking my career...n tt its a challenge 4 me to get thru dis BIG obstacle tt is blocking my way....i hope that dis will b a blessing in disguise..i relli hope so....
nt oni i disappointed myself...but i disappoint my parents as well who hav high hopes 4 me...im such a useless son!!! i cnt even do well in my exams...hw stupid cn i b....haix...im so sorry....i noe u guys are disappointed even though u guys sae its ok...u tried ur best...but i noe u are...im relli reli sorry..i will make it up to all of u...
im gg thru a rough patch here...n i didnt noe it wld b tt hard 4 me to actualli gt back on my feet again...i relli nid all my frens to help me get thru dis...but i noe dey wont hav time 4 me..dey cnt possibly concentrate evrytin of me isnt it...?? so i relli nid to try werk things out on my own...but of course wif sum help of my bestest frens...i relli hope u guys cn help me...coz i jus dunno wd ill do w/o u guys...
evytime wen im alone...nthy to do...my o results wld instantly pop in my mind...n i wld automatically cry...tears in my eyes...haix...i wld think tt its d end of d world 4 me...no future at all...I JUS HATE MYSELF!! im so sorry u guys!!
i hope i cn gt thru dis obstacle b4 i collapse......
Oh goSh..i miss dem so much!! dis is our last prom pic 2gther b4 we all went home...i relli wanna relived tt nite..it ws jus simply da bomb!!! D dancing n eating together....it ws jus simply awesome..i relli hope tt nite wld nvr end but its too much to ask though...oh well..