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Tuesday, September 25, 2007
i've realised sumthin
i was nvr happy EVER
well ya at a point of time dere is happiness in my life
but it ws shortlived
noone can b happy EVERYTIME
nothing is EVER perfect
cum to think of it
i relli miss d old me
i ws so happy n yeah der's awaes a smile on my face
a smile tt is not forced
i dun haf to force myself put a smile infront of my frens jus for the sake of it
i dun haf to put up a brave front in order for my frens not to worry abt me
i miss all that
well things haf changed ever since problems start brewing
problems that affected myself wholly
changed me for wd i am now
im fragile dunno y
but it jus tt im getting more emotional
mayb bcoz i've gone thru a lot in my life
i bcame like tt well i dunno
I've lost tremedously amount of weight can
well i do eat a lot n now i dun exercise anymore
but still i kip losing more weight
mayb bcoz problems affectin causes me to lose weight
i nid to put on more weight!!!



i haf very low self-esteem now
i jus cant like believe in myself easily anymore
ever since having failed my O level early dis yr
i've been telling myself how a failure i've been
its not easy to believe in myself again
d fire in me jus cnt b lit up anymore
its not tt i dun wan it to relit
but its simply cant!!!
i'm relli deeply sorry my frens
u guys believed in me so much
i'm afraid to disappoint u guys more
especially having disappointed my parents aldy
i jus dun wan history to repeat itself
i still jus dun gt it y u guys believed in me so much??
wen i myself dun think i can do it =(
damn it lar!!


Lost nowhere @ 8:45 AM
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