Sunday, December 02, 2007
Each dae passed
d wound became bigger and bigger
it hurts even more right now
i cant let go of the past
well not right now
even though my past hurts me so bad
y cant i jus let it go
forget it forget the past!!!!
fuck it !!!
sumtimes i jus wish to lose my memories
so i wont be able to remember how a HUGE failure i was in d past!!!
hahaha it wont happen
it relli pains me to pretend to be happy infront of my family and frens
and i dunno how long i can hold out much longer
im collapsing soon i noe i am
but der's nothing i can do abt it!!!
fucking it hate it!!!
im so STRESSED OUT!!
should i take the CAT!!
can i make it can i do it??
i retook my o lvl dis yr
but im nt sure wht i cn pass it
and now im maybe takin the CAT examination
but i haf no confidence in myself anymore to take it
afraid to disappoint my parents and myself even more
qns running thru my mind evrydae
what if i fail again?? can i do it??
i've fallen flat once badly n i dun wan it to happen again!!
NEVER!!
haix
i look in d mirror
wd i c is not sum1 who is happy
but sum1 who is very sAd
he wans to be happy but he jus cant anymore
sad isnt it??
Hamdan u jus haf to continue pretending to be happy to make it thru your life
thats the onli thing u can do rite now
FUCKING HATE MY LIFE RITE NOW!!